Yargle, Glutton of Urborg

Nine power for five mana, stapled to three toughness and no abilities whatsoever: a body built as a punchline that happens to work. The 9/3 line is the joke, and it is a real one. That much power still folds to most removal, gets chumped by a single blocker, and dies to any three points of damage you can scrape together at the wrong moment. Yet the number 9 is not arbitrary. A creature that hits for nine carries lethal implications the instant it connects with even a little help: a doubling effect, an evasion grant, a way to bolt on haste and trample. The design files the entire cost of the card into that fragile toughness, then dares you to find a way to land one swing. Glass-cannon beaters with deliberately absurd power-to-cost ratios are an old idea, but this one is stripped even barer: no trample, no menace, no enters-the-battlefield value to salvage the turn when the attack whiffs. The flavor and the math point the same direction. This is a giant frog with a vast, undignified mouth, and the card is honest about the deal it is offering: a single enormous bite that either ends the game or accomplishes nothing at all.