Unscythe, Killer of Kings

Grixis as an equipment color is the joke and the design problem this answers: a shard built on removal, recursion, and aggression gets a sword that does all three in one slot. The +3/+3 and first strike turn any body into a combat-winning threat, but the second ability justifies the three-color cost. First strike is the engine, not a rider: the equipped creature deals its damage first, so anything it kills in combat dies before it can swing back, and that death feeds the exile-and-replace clause. Every creature it strikes down (yours or theirs, in combat or by any other source that turn) becomes a 2/2 Zombie and a denied recursion target, because the corpse gets exiled rather than buried where it can be reanimated. That graveyard-hate clause is the black half of the identity working quietly; the Zombie generation is the aristocrats-adjacent payoff. The card snowballs through combat math: trade up, exile the body, get a body, repeat. It reads as a beatstick and plays as an attrition engine, the sort of layered, multicolor-mandatory toy a three-shard environment produces when it wants its mythic equipment to feel like it could only exist across those three allied colors.