Damocles Base, Sword of Kang
Vehicles occupy an odd slot in the removal math: a crewed body that hits like a creature but ducks sorcery-speed removal aimed at creatures, at the cost of doing nothing until you tap bodies to power it. This one bolts a punisher engine onto that chassis and makes every connection extract a resource. Flying plus deathtouch means it trades up against any blocker and demands a flyer or a chump to stop it, so the villainous choice fires reliably. And the choice is miserable to sit under. Sacrificing a nontoken creature strips a defender's board one piece at a time; refusing costs two life and hands the attacker two cards, so the "safe" branch feeds the engine already beating you. Neither answer buys tempo back. Crew 3 is the tax that slows assembly: three power committed to tapping means you are paying to swing, and it asks whether your other threats would rather attack on their own. The disguise is the point. Punisher effects usually live on fragile creatures that die before they connect twice, so the extortion never accrues; parking it on a Vehicle body that dodges creature-only removal when uncrewed solves the delivery problem that has always kept those effects from paying off. A 5/5 deathtouch flyer draws every answer in the deck; this one hides between combats, then extorts on every hit until the game closes.
