Barbed Servitor

Most attackers want to survive; this one wants to be swung at, blocked, and burned. Because damage never kills it, every point that lands on it is turned straight into life loss for an opponent, which flips ordinary combat math on its head: a defender who blocks or trades is just donating life, and a burn spell aimed at it drains the caster for the very damage the spell was meant to erase. The distinction matters, since indestructibility only stops damage from destroying it. Sacrifice-based removal, edicts, and exile all handle it cleanly without ever triggering the reflection; it is damage-based interaction specifically that turns against its user. The suspect clause bolts on menace and strips its ability to block, so the whole package becomes a one-directional aggressive engine: connect, and you refill your hand while paying one life yourself. That self-inflicted loss is the counterweight the design leans on. A 1/1 that draws cards, punishes any burn thrown at it, and shrugs off destruction would run away with games if the clock were only pointed outward; instead it ticks against its own controller with every swing. The card lives in the narrow band of creatures that punish interaction rather than endure it, where an opponent's cleanest line is frequently to leave it alone and take the beats. The friction between "I need this gone" and "removing it hurts me" is the entire engine.