Warden of the Woods

The trap it sets is defensive, which is the rare posture for a green fatty. A 5/7 with vigilance already asks awkward math of an attacker: too big to trade with, too watchful to race past. Layer on the punishment for interaction and the body stops being a creature you remove and starts being a creature you route around. Point a removal spell at it, tap it down, bounce it, steal it: any opponent-controlled spell or ability that names it as a target refills your hand by two. That clause reframes what the toughness is for. Most oversized green blockers dare you to swing into them; this one dares you to answer it, and taxes the answer whether or not the answer resolves, since the trigger fires on targeting, not on the effect landing. The friction sits entirely on your opponent's side of the table, which is unusual for a card at this size. Green rarely gets to say "interact with me and I profit"; that sentence usually belongs to blue's countermagic or to cards that flash back a spell when disrupted. Here it comes stapled to seven toughness and no downside, so the removal-baiting text reads as a bonus riding on a body that was already going to hold a corner of the board. The reward asks nothing of you: you build no graveyard, hold up no mana, simply present the creature and wait to see whether the table takes the bait.