Wall of Junk
The 0/7 body looks like a wall that never dies, and that's the joke the design is built around: it blocks anything short of seven power, soaks the hit, then bounces itself back to your hand at end of combat, resetting for next turn. The bounce is not a downside so much as a self-resetting mechanism. You replay it for two and block again, indefinitely, which makes it a recurring speed bump rather than a permanent board piece. Most defensive creatures of this stripe ask you to leave a body on the battlefield where it can be killed, sacrificed, or chump-blocked around; this one refuses to commit, treating each block as a discrete transaction that costs the attacker a turn of progress and costs you almost nothing. The toughness ceiling is the real constraint: seven holds the line against the early game, but anything that can swing for seven or more (or anything with trample) renders the whole loop moot. As an artifact it also slots into colorless shells that want a wall without a color commitment, and the return-to-hand clause quietly dodges board wipes that punish creatures by killing them where they stand. It is a small, self-contained engine of stalling, more clever than powerful, and it rewards a patient deck that wants to buy turns while rarely risking the card itself.
