Tromokratis

The two abilities here are a closed feedback loop, and the design joke is that one punishes you for everything the other invites. Hexproof while it sits back means an 8/8 you cannot answer with targeted removal, so the obvious line is to leave it untapped and never expose it. But the unblockable clause flips the moment it swings: the only way to stop it in combat is to commit every creature the defending player controls to the block, which is the design's idea of a Pyrrhic victory. Throw your whole board in front of a kraken and most of it dies; refuse, and 8 damage walks in clean. The card frames combat as a gangplank dilemma where the chump is mandatory and total. The seam between the two clauses is where the card actually lives: to attack or block is to surrender the hexproof, so the window for any removal that does target is precisely the turn it commits to combat. That makes it a sea monster that wants to threaten rather than connect, a clock that extracts a worse trade the longer the defender stalls. As a top-end finisher it reads less like a beater and more like an ultimatum: block with all of it or none of it, and either way the math favors the kraken.