Slime Against Humanity

Most any-number-of-copies designs, from Relentless Rats to Shadowborn Apostle, count what is currently on the battlefield: more copies down, bigger bonus. This one inverts the accounting. It scales off what has left your library and hand, tallying the Oozes and copies of itself in your graveyard and in exile, so every cast is a floor rather than a ceiling. The token grows precisely because earlier copies were milled, discarded, or exiled by an opponent who thought they were answering the threat. Discarding a copy feeds the counter. Self-milling feeds it. Losing one to a counterspell feeds it. That turns the usual attrition math backwards: every copy an opponent strips from you hands you a larger body next time, which makes the card almost impossible to grind out. The base of two counters guarantees a warm 2/2 with trample even on the first cast, so a single copy is never a stone-dead draw the way a lone Apostle can be. The commitment it demands sits in the deckbuilding: you need a real stack of copies and, ideally, some engine to stock the graveyard, because one lonely copy is a forgettable creature. Built correctly, it converts the graveyard, the resource most decks treat as pure loss, into a running scoreboard that only climbs.