Scrawling Crawler

The symmetry is the trap. On your upkeep, everyone refills, which reads like a group-hug value engine until the second clause starts doing the accounting: your draws are free, everyone else's cost a life. That asymmetry turns a communal card-advantage effect into a slow drain, and unlike most symmetrical-wheel designs, it bills only the other seats. Where Howling Mine hands both sides equal fuel and asks you to out-leverage the extra cards, this one hands out the same cards but charges everyone but you for them. The bulk-draw lineage is old, symmetrical card-drawing has been a recurring design toy for decades, but bolting an Underworld Dreams-style penalty directly onto the wheel is what gives the effect a clock. And the penalty is not limited to this card's own upkeep triggers: every extra draw an opponent takes feeds it, so their cantrips, wheels, and card-advantage engines all pay the tax whether or not you ever attack. The 3/2 body is beside the point; the Construct exists to be a colorless, splashable home for a life-loss subscription anyone can install. It answers the question every group-symmetry card raises, which is why hand the table free cards at all, and its answer is blunt: because you are charging them for the privilege in a currency you never spend.