Recumbent Bliss

Pacifism with a tax break attached. The core effect (an aura that strips a creature of both attacking and blocking) has been white's clean answer to a single threat since the earliest sets, trading a card for a card and asking nothing more. What this version adds is the slow drip: a once-per-upkeep optional life gain that quietly compounds while the locked-down creature sits there doing nothing. That second clause is the whole reason to reach for it over the leaner versions. Against an aggressive opponent, the creature you neutralize is often the one threatening to race you, so the aura answers the clock twice: it removes the attacker from combat and it backfills the life total the attacker was supposed to drain. The friction is the same one every removal-aura carries: it does not get rid of the creature, only its combat relevance, so any way to give the enchanted body an activated ability or to bounce it back to hand turns the lock into wasted mana. But for the cost of pinning down one creature and bleeding a small advantage out of the matchup over the long game, it does honest work in the slow, grinding white decks that would rather outlast an opponent than outrace one.