Paupers' Cage

A punishment effect aimed only at opponents, built around the inversion of the card-advantage philosophy that defined its era: where most artifacts of the period rewarded hoarding resources, this one taxes the empty hand. The trigger reads each opponent at their upkeep and asks one question: are you running low on cards? If the answer is yes, it bleeds two. The clock points precisely at the decks that want to dump their grip fast, so an aggressive opponent who has spent down to a card or two watches the last few points of their own life drain away on a timer they cannot disable without removal. The two-card threshold is the pressure valve that keeps it honest: a player holding a full hand never sees a single point, so the artifact sits inert against control opponents who hoard answers and only sharpens its teeth against the topdeck wars and burn races where two damage a turn actually decides the game. It is repeatable damage with no targeting, no activation cost, and no way for the victim to interact with the trigger short of refilling their hand or destroying the rock. For three colorless, it asks nothing of its controller's deck except patience, and rewards the kind of grindy attrition plan that wants the opponent's emptying grip to start costing them the game rather than winning it.