Lightning Volley

The Goblin Sharpshooter trick, scaled across an entire board for a single turn. Every creature you control becomes a pinger that taps to deal one to any target, so a wide enough position turns into a coordinated burn array: a token swarm reaches for the dome, or a row of small bodies gets sniped off the table before they can block. Timing is where the card finds its purpose. Held up and cast in response to a sweeper, or after combat has forced blocks, the granted ability arms instantly, letting an already-developed board spend its taps the moment the spell resolves. It scales hardest beside untap effects and creatures that arrive in multiples, since every additional untapped body is another point of reach. The catch is the cost on the granted ability: it carries summoning sickness like any tap ability, so a creature that has not been under your control since your most recent turn cannot use it. A board you just rebuilt is a board that cannot fire. That is the constraint that keeps it from ever being a staple. Four mana for a one-turn effect that does nothing on an empty field, doled out a single damage at a time, makes this a payoff dressed as a trick: worth the slot only when the table is already wide enough that the arithmetic is lethal.