Heirs of Stromkirk

The math behind this Vampire is sharper than the printed 2/2 lets on, because its two abilities cover for each other's weaknesses. The counter trigger is the snowball: each connection makes the body bigger, and the bigger body hits harder next swing. But a self-growing attacker is only a threat if it keeps getting through, and that is the job intimidate does here. Evasion that fails only against red or artifact blockers means most board states cannot wall it, so the loop keeps running: connect, grow, connect again, out of removal range within a couple of attack steps. It needs no support to function (no anthem, no equipment, no sacrifice fodder); it completes itself on the strength of one landed hit. The wager is in the rate. Four mana buys a body that produces zero pressure on the turn it lands, so you are trading raw tempo for an inevitability that only matures over several attack steps. That pays off where the opponent has no red or artifact creature to throw in front of it, and breaks down against a board built to wall it: a wall of red blockers, or a pile of artifact chumps to eat the swing turn after turn. The type line promises a tribal beater; the card plays as a bet on connection. Land the first hit and it scales past answers; get stalled and it idles as a 2/2 with evasion it cannot cash in.