Glissa's Retriever

The clock a poison deck actually wants runs shorter than the twenty-life clock, and this beast is built to bank on that difference. Toxic 3 puts an opponent three-tenths of the way to the ten-counter kill on a single connection, and haste gets that connection going the turn it lands. The evasion clause is narrower than it looks: it slips past mana dorks and one-drop utility bodies (anything with power 2 or less) but still eats a block from a proper defender, so it is a hedge against chump-fodder rather than a guarantee. Where the design gets pointed is the corrupted death trigger, which pays out proportionally to how much poison you have already spread across the table, returning one card per opponent sitting at three or more counters. That ties the reward directly to the toxic body doing its job: a well-progressed poison board turns the creature into a graveyard rebate the moment it trades or gets removed, a rare instance of a beater whose replacement value scales with the same win condition it advances rather than functioning as an isolated engine. The self-exile is the leash on the loop. The retriever cashes out once and stays gone, so it refuels your hand without refueling itself, keeping the corrupted payoff a one-time settlement rather than a repeatable machine.