Fleshbag Marauder

Edicts had existed long before this Zombie stapled one to a body: Diabolic Edict and its kin force a sacrifice without choosing a target, sidestepping protection, hexproof, and shroud in a way no targeted removal can. What this design does is graft that effect onto a 3/1, which matters less for the body than for what happens when the trigger resolves. The clause doing the heavy lifting is "each player," not "each opponent": the Marauder counts itself, so with no other creatures around it eats its own 3/1 and leaves nothing behind. That self-feeding is exactly what makes it a recursion engine rather than a one-shot. Reanimate it, blink it, sacrifice and return it, and the edict fires on every reentry, turning a single removal effect into a repeatable attrition lock; the body it owes to its own trigger is usually the body it just brought back. The downside (you sacrifice too) inverts into an upside in a deck built around death and return, where the creature you feed it is fodder or a value piece you wanted in the yard anyway. The other restriction is "of their choice": this is taxation, not assassination, and a single token or expendable blocker shrugs it off. But against a board of genuine threats, the value lives in the trigger, not the fragile 3/1 that delivers it. The body is a delivery system the deck expects to die; the edict is the part that keeps coming back.