Dress Down
Most abilities-off effects are permanent fixtures: Humility rewrites the board indefinitely, a static like Torpor Orb sits and shuts one thing down forever. This is built to fire in a window and vanish. Flashed in, it strips every creature of everything (keywords, activated abilities, static bonuses, the lot), cantrips on entry, and self-sacrifices at the end step so the board springs back. That temporary shape is the whole point. It answers resolved threats that are otherwise hard to touch: a hexproof beater becomes targetable, a creature-land stops counting as a creature's worth of abilities, an indestructible commander loses its shields for the turn. The timing wrinkle rewards precision, though. Abilities on the stack live independently of their source, so flashing this in after a creature's entry ability has already gone on the stack does nothing to that trigger; to blank it, you have to resolve this before the creature ever enters, while the creature is still a spell. It also aims inward, blanking your own board too. Tokens minted by an anthem or dorks that tap for mana survive as collateral, but a creature whose stats come from a static ability shrinks the instant this resolves, which quietly turns "creatures lose all abilities" into an asymmetric sweeper against anything sized by its own text. It reads like a hoser and plays like a scalpel.
