Barbed Shocker
The wheel attached to a beater. The discard-and-redraw effect is a familiar red trick, usually parked on a sorcery or an enchantment where it refuels both players at once; here it is bolted to a hasty trampler so the symmetry tilts in your favor. The wording is the whole reason it works: a hit forces a player to discard their entire hand, then draw that many cards. An opponent sitting on a fat grip of seven loses everything they were holding into the graveyard and gets seven fresh cards off the top. That is the punchline. Against a deck hoarding answers, connecting once empties the grip and hands them new cards rather than no cards, and because the replacements are random, the held-up counterspell and the carefully sandbagged removal end up in the bin instead of in hand. The body is built to land the trigger rather than to dominate the board: haste means it swings the moment it resolves, and trample is the piece that matters most against chump defenders, letting the 2/2 push a point past a lone blocker so the player still takes damage and eats the wheel. The cost of all this is the 2/2 frame itself, which gets outclassed in combat and only connects when the path is open enough to land even a single point. This is a disruption piece wearing a creature's clothes, an aggressive answer to durdling that punishes a full hand instead of an empty one.

