Atogatog

The joke is in the name, an Atog whose food is other Atogs, and it scans before you even read the text. The Atog tribe was built on the conceit that each member devours a different resource (one eats artifacts, another lands, another the turn itself), and the gag here is to crown that menagerie with a five-color overlord whose sole diet is its own kind. The sacrifice ability scales honestly, granting +X/+X equal to the eaten creature's power, but the supply line is the constraint: it can only feed on Atogs, and the Atog tribe is not a deep bench. Worse, the things it wants to eat are themselves the engine, each one a self-sacrificing specialist that would rather spend itself on its own resource than be thrown into the boss. So the capstone competes with its own fodder for board presence, and the WUBRG cost demands a five-color manabase assembled entirely to support a tribe nobody was ever meant to take seriously. This is the self-referential tribal capstone in its purest form: a card whose entire reason to exist is to be the punchline of a joke that started long before it arrived. It grows by consuming its own kind, and consuming its own kind is the only thing it can do.