Astarion's Thirst

Exile removal usually charges a premium for the clean answer; this one hands the premium back. The instant hits any creature and exiles it outright, denying death triggers and recursion, then feeds the victim's power into permanent growth on a commander creature you control. The counters are the real hook: unconditional exile at instant speed is already a fair rate, and this turns the cast into a one-for-one with a rider that scales directly with the threat it just cleared. Point it at an opponent's alpha-striker and your general absorbs exactly the stats you were most afraid of. The design leans entirely on the singleton-commander structure, and the split in outcomes is the honest part: if you control no commander creature, the exile still resolves, the counters simply have nowhere to go. The removal never depends on the payoff, but the payoff depends on the board you have committed. Because these are +1/+1 counters rather than a temporary buff, the growth sticks around, though it evaporates the instant your commander heads back to the command zone, worth remembering before you lean on a decorated general surviving a wrath. It reads as black's answer to the combat-fueled growth white and green earn through fighting, except the fuel here is the exact creature you most wanted off the table. Answer and reward fold into a single card, with the exile half strong enough that the counters land as close to free profit.