Assault Intercessor

The Chainsword ability inverts a familiar attrition tax: instead of punishing you for losing creatures, it punishes your opponents for losing theirs. Every removal spell, chump block, and sacrifice trade on the other side of the table becomes life loss, and the trigger fires per player, so a symmetrical board wipe against multiple opponents chips away at every one of them at once. That is life loss, not lifegain: this is not a drain that repays you, it is a clock that only ticks in one direction, on the opponents' totals. What makes the pressure reliable rather than incidental is the body it rides. First strike lets this attacker kill a smaller blocker without taking a scratch, and that dead blocker is itself a Chainsword trigger; menace forces two creatures into a block the attacker is built to survive. The engine is closed-loop: send it into combat, force the trade, collect the two life from whatever it kills. It sits in the Orzhov tradition of converting board presence into life totals, but where classic aristocrat payoffs (Blood Artist, Zulaport Cutthroat) care about your own creatures dying, this one flips the direction and asks the opponents to be the ones bleeding. The 3/2 line keeps the engine honest; the incentive it imposes (every death across the table costs the controller) is a pressure this color pair rarely gets to apply from the aggressive seat rather than the grindy one.